Controversies come and go, they’re all really just media hype any way. Today it’s Starbucks cups, tomorrow it’ll be who came out of the closet. A year from now, it’ll be some tiny detail about the presidential election that has nothing to do at all from leadership. With Facebook and Twitter and on-line support groups for us to weigh in our opinions to people we don’t know so we can hide behind a keyboard and feel like we are making ourselves heard.
One of the hardest things for me to do in my life is make a relationship. Not always a friend, but a relationship. Many times these turn into friends, sometimes they don’t. Relationships are hard because they require two or more people to open up and be honest without getting mad at each other. I tend to be an emotional person, so that’s what makes relationships hard, the not getting mad part.
Grace is essential in any relationship. When we are hurt or feel another person has wronged us, it’s tougher still to get our ego out of the way. To put ourselves on the spot knowing full well that someone is going to zing us is challenging enough. To show that person some grace, to not get mad or upset in the process while they share themselves in opposition to you …. whew, I don’t have a word for that.
My observation about having these types of conversations on-line is that either a) people are overly aggressive, especially when they don’t really know their position on an issue; or b) they are overly gracious because they don’t want to get into it. This is why it’s a poor medium for discussion.
Here’s my challenge: to get together face to face with someone I know who has a difference of opinion and have a real conversation. To be interested and ask them questions about why they stand where they stand and (hopefully) have the same happen in return. Not to attempt to change each other’s mind, but to come to understanding. Be honestly interested in them and their responses, allow them their place and point of view, express my own, and let it be. To have respect without needing to prove each other right or wrong.
In other words, let’s relate.
Leave a Reply