Last month I talked about my personal experiences with bullies. Today, I’m going to talk about the modern day bully. I recently had a conversation with someone I am close with. It was one that I didn’t think I would ever hear from this individual. I have heard this from others and have overhead similar conversations between different parties. What’s the modern day bully look like?
The modern day bully deals in virtue. They talk in terms of “my way is better than your way.” My way is good and here are all the reasons why. Your way is bad and here are all the reasons why. They may be “right” or “wrong”. I’ll address that at the end.
Lets get something straight before I get into specifics. There are more good things about virtue than bad. It’s when we use our virtue to shame others, or put “our way” on a pedestal that virtue loses its meaning. We can’t be coming down hard on people based on virtue(s). When we do, the other person is more likely to solidify their own way of thinking than gravitate to the virtuous side. We need to allow people to figure things out for themselves.
Right, so what are the specifics? It’s a touchy subject, so don’t say I didn’t warn you…
Vaccines, vaccination mandates, and vaccine passports.
So here’s what happened. This adult child (AC) was pressuring two other loved ones (LO A+B) into getting their COVID Vaccine. As both are seniors, they were at the front of the line to receive the vaccine. The two people had issues with it’s Emergency Use label and preferred a “wait and see” approach, deciding they would wait 6-12 months before getting the vaccine.
AC was using all the standard virtues for getting vax’d, it’ll prevent you from getting the disease, it’ll protect others, you’re seniors and we all want you to live as long as possible, etc. All worth while arguments to say to your loved ones. Also short sided. Can you see why?
The next day, LO A has a heart attack and spends three days in the hospital. AC becomes worried that their conversation the previous day was a factor and becomes worried. Was it a factor, we’ll never know. It was a stressful conversation. There were other factors also. But once AC’s ego and emotion were cleared, AC went right back into their routine, while talking with LO A on the hospital phone.
Listen, none of us is perfect. We all have to decide what is more important to us, our relationship with our loved ones’ or our virtues. There is no wrong answer. Yet there are consequences of choosing one over the other, which ever we choose (or prioritize).
That’s what I’ve been building up to here. What’s more important to you? Your relationship with your loved one’s, society, ideals? There’s no right or wrong answer. That also means there’s no right or wrong answer for others, even those who choose differently than you do. The issue of vaccination isn’t one of right vs wrong or good vs evil. It is one of preference. Different people have different preferences. Learn the rewards and consequences of your preferences (priorities) and either learn to live with them or change yourself. Because you can’t change others. That’s up to them.
Regardless if you vaccinate or not, God Bless you.
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